


Camera Flash

by JotunVali



Category: The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Closeted Character, Family Issues, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Self-Hatred, Tsunderes, too many responsibilities
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2020-10-25 14:30:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20725742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JotunVali/pseuds/JotunVali
Summary: Flash has lost someone he cared about. He's about to visit someone else he cares a lot more about. Even if he won't admit it.When the camera flash is off, the pic looks blurry and dark.When it's on, the pic looks brighter and more joyous.Welcoming repressed for years feelings works the same way.





	1. Chapter 1

“Gwendoline!”

Gwen was dead. An accident including Spider-man, his sister Jessie told him.

Gwen, the only person who bore up with and still supported Flash Thompson until the end was dead. Flash tried to take a deep breath. He covered his face with both hands. Maybe to breathe better or to hide from harsh reality, Flash didn’t know. The last time he’d seen her was at the graduation. She said she was proud of him. Flash smiled. No one had said that to him before. And a few days later, she was dead. Flash sniffled. He cried. It was stupid, so stupid but she was like a second mother to him. Bearing his mistakes and thick head yet still helping and supporting him despite everything. He looked at the newspaper again.

_ “Spider-menace?” _

He ruffled it in an inky ball and threw it in the trash. 

_ Menace _ ? Bullshit! How did these fuckers DARE to accuse Spidey, Flash’s dream hero, of such a… horrible event? It was an accident! Spidey just couldn’t save her! Flash was sure of it! That’s what sometimes happens to heroes! Sometimes, they can’t save everyone! Poor Spider-man must feel so awful right now. Maybe as awful as him. It’d even look like the spider had stopped to show himself ever since. 

But the one guy who must feel the most terrible now was Peter. Peter Parker. He loved Gwen so much. As much as Flash loved Peter. Maybe more. What should he do? Go back to New York and see Peter? Express his condolences? No, that was a bad idea. Coming back to the man he was gay for -despite the daily pulp beating- just after the girlfriend of the latter died? So wrong and so creepy! And Flash must be the last person Peter would see now! But… maybe he could go to pay respects to Gwen’s family, who must be the most miserable family now, and then take a chance to see Peter afterwards? 

That sounded so stupid and dangerous. But hey, that was Flash’s second and third names.

* * *

Why would it be difficult? Within the 3 last years, Peter had lost his uncle who’d raised him like a father and the girlfriend he loved more than anything. Why would he reject the jerk who used to publicly beat him at high school? That was nonsense! Flash thought as he was walking closer to Parker’s home. Besides, he hoped the boy he secretly loved for years was absent. That way, Flash would go back earlier and lighter. But he had to try at least or he’d regret it all his life! He was in New York, he felt brave -for once- and he was alive. He wasn’t going to waste this once in a lifetime chance.

“Time is luck.” as Gwen said.


	2. Chapter 2

The algebra assignment was as brain-killing as the previous one. Flash had to figure out a trick to get away from that. Why not a little chat with his afternoon teacher Gwen?

“Say, Gwen” he started while still faking to look at his book. “Why the hook up with Parker?”

“Why the sudden care for my private life, Flash?” Gwen retorted, her eyes locked on her book as well. 

“I don’t know. It’s just, you know, like one of these rough equations here. I don’t get it. He’s a nerd, nose always in science books and cameras… I don’t get how a… smart girl like you...” He looked at her. She lift her eyes from her book and glared at her student. “...would hang around with weirdos like him.”

“You have better specimens to suggest, maybe, Flash?” Gwen sourly grinned.

Who did he think he was, bad-mouthing her choices in boys? Just to skip his homework…

“I don’t know… maybe a… tougher guy. Cooler, more… sportive.” Flash coyly mumbled, not looking at her.

“Oh! Like you?” She foresaw. “Look Flash, I’m really happy you worry about my marital fulfillment but I should ask you not to poke your nose in business that’s no concern of yours  and go back to your work, please.”

The disruptive pupil looked down, like a guilty puppy. His strategy had failed just like he’d fail that exhausting for his brain assignment.

“Bold from you to ask me out since you’re not interested in girls.” Gwen implied.

_ The fuck? _

“Wh-what? Y-you think I’m-! No way! I-I’m not… Tha-that’s gross, stupid, I…” Flash awkwardly stammered.

“Hey, that’s fine.” Gwen assured in a friendly voice. “I don’t care if you like boys. Just don’t lie to run from your work.”

_ It’s that room, the school, the whole city I want to run from right now! _

He heavily huffed out. Thinking of what he could reply or not reply at all.

“How do you know?” He finally asked, waiting for being whipped or something. Avoiding her stare again.

“It’s my job to know things.” Gwen shrugged her shoulders as if it was obvious. “Also I saw how you hover over Peter. Now more often since you’ve stopped expressing your affection with punches. Also, I’m not in your way.” She reminded her recent break-up with Peter.

Flash felt a surge of hope spring in his heart then, with disappointment, remembered Parker was straight.

“That’s bullshit. That… that’s stupid!” He expelled. “Wh-why would I…  _ brawl  _ with a guy if I were… nuts for him?” He looked for a way out.

“I don’t know, why would you?” Wise Gwen passed the buck.

No way out. He was cornered. Busted.

“You gonna tell him?” He asked, scared.

“I should fill in for you for  _ that  _ work too?” Gwen half-kid. “No. First, we don’t talk to each other anymore and either way, Flash, the choice to come out is only yours. It’s not up to me or anyone else. Just you.”

“Alright.” He faintly nodded. “Ok.”

He didn’t know if he should cry out of despair of being exposed or out of joy for knowing such a kind and compassionate person. He bit his quivering lip.

“Alright, let’s… let’s get back to the algebra thing.” He tried to move on.

That’s was the last time he’d try to skip his homework.


	3. Chapter 3

Flash took a deep and nervous breath. 

_ Ok. I’m at his door. Now, I’m gonna knock. His aunt gonna open, she’ll say Peter’s not here and you’ll go back. Simple. _

His shaking fist was inches away from the door.

_ Come on! It’s just a door! It’s not going to eat your hand! _

His arm dropped off.

_ Fuck. I can’t. I  _ can’t  _ do it! Coward. I’m a fucking stupid coward! I’ve always been so.  _

The door opened on its own accord. Flash flinched as if it was possessed by some ghost. An old lady appeared.

“What is it? You’ve been staring at my house for a long time, young man. Is there a problem?” She asked in an accusing tone.

_ Great. A coward and a creeper stalker! Good job, Eugene! _

That woman must be Peter’s aunt. He’d seen her at the graduation day. The last time he’d seen Gwen and Peter. Well, mostly Gwen. At least, in his last moments with her, she was  smiling. Flash wasn’t so sure about Peter. Maybe… maybe coming here was a bad idea from the beginning! He should go. He should leave Peter alone once and for all. And like with Gwen, have a last memory of him smiling and happy. 

“Aunt May, what is it? Someone’s bothering you?” The person Flash was so eager and so reluctant to see appeared next to the lady.

_ “I love you.” _

_ “Wow, I love you too.”  _

That clueless nerd probably didn’t get Flash hadn’t said that just out of bliss of having graduated. He’d been… he still was sincere. He knew Peter only had feelings for girls, for Gwen, which was more than understandable, but… just for a moment, just for one second, he’d fooled himself, let himself believe his gay feelings were two-sided. Flash thought,  _ knew  _ he’d never felt that happy before.

“Flash?” Peter asked in surprise. “Aren’t you… aren’t you supposed to be in Dakota?”

That just was it. 

Surprise.

No hate.

No disgust.

Peter just was  _ surprised  _ to see him.

“Did you invite him?” May asked her nephew. “Peter, it’s late, why…”

“No.” Her nephew protested. “No I didn’t- wait. I know why he’s here. I should have known.” He sighed. He sounded tired. “Come! Come in, Flash, don’t stay in the dark.” 

He… he invited him? In his home? Him, Flash Thompson? 

“Well, come in!” Peter smiled. “Did college steal your ears?”

“Uh! Yes! Yes, I’ll come in.” He blushed. “Evening, ma’am.” He greeted aunt May.

“Evening.” She replied, puzzled, before finally closing the door.

“Do...uh… do I take off my shoes?” Flash timidly asked the boy he once insulted and beat up so easily.

“Uh… no. No need.” Peter answered.

“Thanks.”

“For what?” Peter almost chuckled.

“For… well, you know… not slamming the door on my face.” Flash shrugged his shoulders, looking down his feet.

“Why would I do that?”

_ Why indeed, you stupid, adorable geek!  _ Flash slightly clenched his fists.

“Well,... uh, you know… my little… show-offs at school,... it’s night and… I’ve…” He sighed. “I’ve learnt for Gwen…”

“Right.” Peter merely responded. As though he didn’t know what to add. After all, his girlfriend had died, murdered, what else could he say about the matter? Feel yes, sure, but  _ say _ ?

“I-I thought maybe you… you wouldn’t see… certain guys… after that.” Flash stammered.

Then his heart was smashed.

By a pair of glistening eyes.

Peter’s eyes.

Glaring, no, begging him?

He didn’t understand. Was Peter going to punch Flash? Like back at his uncle’s death? Was he eventually going to throw Flash out of his house? He knew it! He shouldn’t have come here! That  _ WAS  _ the worst idea ever! And bad ideas was Thompson’s specialty! 

_ Alright. Punch me. If that can make you feel good. I owe you that.  _ Flash closed his eyes, expecting a punch, a curse, a slap, anything BUT what Peter finally did.

He jumped on Flash and hugged him tight. So tight the blonde boy thought if that sudden hug got any tighter, his ribs were going to break. He heard a gross sniffling and… cries?

“You jerk. I’m happy, I’m so fucking  _ happy  _ you’re here.” Peter wailed on his shoulder. “You don’t know… how much I’m glad to see you. So of course, of COURSE, I would see you, stupid!” 

Shit. He shouldn’t. He didn’t have the right! Peter has the right to after losing his girlfriend! What right, what reason Flash had to… to…

He bursted into too long repressed tears on Peter’s shoulder and hugged him back. 

No. It was wrong. He shouldn’t feel happy! They both had lost a girl that meant a lot for them! Peter, the boy he loved had lost his girlfriend! He shouldn’t feel happy! What’s more,  _ Peter  _ shouldn’t be happy to see him! Flash was the worst bastard on Earth! Flash had beaten him, humiliated him a thousand times! He shouldn’t-!  _ They  _ shouldn’t…

“Are you alright, boys?” Aunt May noticed them. She sounded worried.

“Yes! Yes, we are, aunt May.” Peter lied as he was wiping his tears from his reddish eyes.

Like the selfish twisted bastard he was, Flash wished that hug had lasted longer.

“No, you’re not.” May retorted. “I think I know why he’s here.” She talked about Flash. “It’s about Gwen, isn’t it?”

“Uh… yes. Yes, ma’am.” Flash wiped his own tears.

“Thank you. You’re a good friend. No one, even people from his school, has come to see my boy.”

Him? Good? A friend?

“Aunt May, please…” Peter muttered. “It’s no matter. It’s not like I want to be pitied or something.”

“It’s not that!” May protested. “When you lose someone important in your life, you need to have people, your family and your friends here for you. To support you. Whether you want it or not! That’s true for me and that’s most certainly true for you! And I think it’s sad only two people are here for you now!” She regretted.

_ Sadder when one of these people is the bastard who used to beat up your nephew. _

“Well, if I have only my aunt and one friend now, maybe there is a good reason why!” Peter bitterly sassed her before storming away, to his bedroom.

“Wha-? What does that mean? Peter!” May called him, vainly. She sighed. “I’m so sorry. You came all this way for him and… ugh. He’s been like that since… well, you know.” She apologized to Flash. “It’s like he feels guilty for what happened. Like he thinks he only brings trouble to the people around him. It already was difficult when my husband died but...ugh.” She sighed. She looked tired too. “Now, he won’t talk to anyone. He barely puts his feet outside now...” She stared in a blank space. “But I forget my manners.” She collected herself. “Do you want something? Coffee?”

“Uh, no thank-”

_ Please, you’re not gonna ask her beer?? _

“Yes. Yes, thank you.” Flash changed his mind. 


End file.
